Another year older and....

It's my birthday, you know, and what a day! My day started with a phone call at 5:15 a.m. that woke me up but I couldn't find the phone in time to answer it and couldn't go back to sleep. It was a tough day at work, ending me losing and then finding checks worth more than I can count and then I had the pleasure of seeing probably the year's best movie with a woman friend who is really like a soul-sister to me...I just feel really good.

I'm older...People keep wishing me a Happy New Year and I keep saying, wait, it's my birthday...It's a strange time of year to have a b'day, after Christmas and Hanukah and before New Years when everyone is tired and out of money and low on energy and just wanting to coast...But it was one of my happiest ones ever.

An old boyfriend emailed and wrote that he hoped I find what I am looking for in the New Year. It made me realize that, for the first time in memory, I am no longer "looking" for anything, but enjoying my life and just willing to experience what it brings me next. I am just content with what I have and who I am. Not that I've found the answers to all of life's questions, but maybe I no longer need to know. And that I just am so very happy with what I have right now. This minute. Lovely place to be, just lovely.

I had several different birthday celebrations with women friends this year, lucky me. Each a happy and joyful time, especially last night with the WOW ladies. I look around at the women in the group and just marvel at how different they are, yet how they each embrace their life and their womanliness so passionately. And how they seem to relish the company of other women so openly and joyfully.

I guess what I'm trying to say is that I am happy. Life for me this year has been difficult at work and personally, but I am happy. Happy to be alive to feel pain and joy, happy that I have my sight and my hearing and my intellect, happy to have old friends that have loved me through fun and tough times and new friends that I am growing to love. Happy that my daughter is living a good and rich life and that my grandchildren are my greatest pleasure. Happy that my son-in-law takes good care of them and surprised me with a new wireless computer keyboard and mouse all set up and ready to go. Happy that I have a job that is fulfilling and provides for my needs. Happy that I'm alive.

Kinda corny, I know. But am I looking to find what I want? No, I have everything I need and am rich beyond measure. Thanks to all of you for celebrating this birthday with me - I treasure the memories of your smiles and laughs and hugs.