June 1, 2014

Connecting with our feminine.



Sometimes, things are beyond description, just needing to be experienced and felt.  Such was the speaker at our recent Wow meeting.  After a lovely and unusually healthy potluck meal, we gathered to listen to Tarnie Fulloon, our speaker.  Lucky us.

Tarnie has an interesting story that many of us can identify with.  Raised on a farm in Australia, she learned at an early age to be strong and responsible, often taking on what would be called “manly” tasks of heavy physical work, even at her petite size.   She decided early on that she would not need a man to take care of her, that she would be able to do so herself, and thus began the limiting of her access to her feminine side in favor of the masculine.

How does this connect to her presentation?  Tarnie teaches that we women are over-committed and over-responsible because of our abiding so heavily in the masculine part of ourselves.  We plan, we push too hard, we over-achieve, we give too much, and we people-please.  We end up feeling that we are never enough, we feel shame, and we become critical and judgmental.   We live someone else’s idea of what our life should be and we allow the voices of others to drown out our own.  We feel disconnected, resentful, anxious, numb, dead inside, and tired of living like this.  Sound familiar?
The key is to reconnect with our feminine side, which allows us to live a more creative life, choosing what we enjoy and what nurtures us.  Instead of listening to the voice that says others are more important, we learn to access who we really are, who we are meant to be.  We must let go of our inner critic, live more in the moment, and let go of the “what-ifs”.  

Tarnie teaches that, to accomplish this, we need to reconnect with our body through movement and meditation.  Losing our connection to our body causes us to lose ourselves.  We resist going from our mind to our body out of fear because the mind requires the status quo to feel safe.   Through movement and meditation, it is so much easier to be in the moment, to feel  our bodies, to access the “real” us.

Tarnie led us in a body meditation by having us stand, close our eyes, and start to move our bodies.  First our shoulders, then our arms, hips, and feet.  Meditation isn’t easy, meditating for more than two breaths is success, but this movement meditation allowed me to be in the moment, stop my thinking, and be free of concerns and worries instantly.  After our exercise, Tarnie asked us how we felt and the ladies answers were:  calm, confident, strong, joyful, happy, loose.  Imagine that, a few minutes of such a simple exercise and our sense of ourselves became more peaceful and more centered.   

Feeling out of sorts or wondering what exactly is your place in life?  Feeling overwhelmed and exhausted?  Wishing you could have more joy in life?  Contact Tarnie and learn to find yourself and become the woman who is strong and creative, can master a job and still feel joy in relationships and life.  We were all quite changed by our limited time with Tarnie.  It can happen for you, too!  You can reach this magical and delightful woman through her website at http://www.tarniefulloon.com/

1 comment:

Sam said...

Ellen, what a beautiful column. Such an important subject. I will check out Tarnie's website! Thank you for being there and continuing to send out such inspirational and important Ellen News! :-)