Airplanes and Snow White and Chicken dinner..

I'm just back from Leon's Conversations. I went especially to meet a potential speaker for a WOW meeting (and Lauri loves the chicken he makes for dinner). Whew, I knew in the first two minutes of her talk that I couldn't bring her to a WOW meeting, the girls would just chew her up and spit her out! The topic was supposed to be "knowing ourselves" and I'm always eager to learn these types of things in the hopes of making my life more meaningful. So we had our chicken and salad and Leon told us about living with his new girlfriend, which he enjoys immensely, and then said that he didn't know how long it would last, that at our age you never know, and we were a bit taken aback, like we go into such a relationship hoping it lasts and here he is being "realistic" about the possibility it won't. But he looks happy, he really does, and we're happy for him.

So the speaker started with a story about a guy on an airplane and then she went to Pinocchio and then to what appeared to be Snow White, a lady with vertically-challenged neighbors, and then said we are each the center of our own universe. I thought that maybe I fell asleep or was taken away for a few minutes by an alien from outer space because I must have missed something valuable and that's why I couldn't follow what she was saying. Then she talked about styles of behaving and William Marston and DISC and what can you see? and paces like slow and fast and being task or people oriented and then we took a test that showed I was S and C but was I supposed to answer the questions from what I thought about myself or how I think others see me and I was just really lost. I have no clue.

I think what she was saying is that we hear things and handle tasks differently, from the bottom-liner to the detailed oriented, etc, and that it's important to recognize our own style and the style of the person with whom we are interacting. I guess the ladies around me were equally lost so they started talking about what we want from a guy, whether we wanted to get married or not, whether we could really live with a guy or what. A few wanted to get married so they could stop dating. One lady said she could live with a guy, but that they had to have separate bedrooms so she could send him there when she wanted to be alone. I'm not sure if I should share my views on this subject, but I'm gonna anyway, so my thought is to have him show up with flowers, have a great dinner, rip off his clothes and ravage him, sleep in his arms, wake up to breakfast in bed (whatever that might mean at the time), and then send him home so that I could do whatever I wanted the rest of the day. Ah, just the thought of it!

So the speaker? No. The chicken? Yes. And for all of you who missed it, here is the recipe: Take chicken pieces, coat with Balsamic vinegar, cover with something like ginger teriyaki marinade, add garlic and onion powder, sprinkle Parmesan over the top, and bake at 350 degrees for 2 hours. Yummy.

Meet me in Long Beach Friday night!

I'm a bit disoriented this week. My schedule was different, and I worked Wednesday so that I could take off Friday. I'll tell you why in a minute.

I think part of the disorientation is the news of the week. I had one patient tell me she can't even listen to the radio anymore, for fear that the news will come on and it would upset her terribly. I've given up reading the paper, but it's impossible not to hear about the current tragedies of the world. Life is so short and we are so mortal that it's hard to separate what happens to others from the possibility that it can happen to us. I'm in a profession where mortality is a constant issue, but this week a few such cases brought me to tears. People talk about "getting over" something or "moving on" but I know that there are certain things that happen when healing and recovery are just not possible. I know, I know, that we should live life in the moment, acknowledge and appreciate every blessing, and love and be kind to as many people as cross our path. But it's so hard not to dwell on such terrible things, because we know it could be us or someone close to us and that's just unbearable.

So what's with Friday night? Life is for the living, I've heard that, and I believe we should enjoy it as much as possible while we have the chance. Watch more sunsets, really take those walks on the beach, stop and enjoy the beauty of a new baby in the stroller going by, and enjoy time with friends. So Friday night? Yep, I'm going to that concert I wrote about recently, the 70s concert in Long Beach that really sounds like fun. And couldn't we all use more of that? Apparently, I'm going to be a worker bee for one of the promoters who I met at an event of a new friend, but again I already wrote about that. I hear a rumor that I'll be working in the "will call" section, where you pick up tickets you purchased online or on the phone. So, I invite you all to join me there and pull me out of the booth so I can "groove" (is that a 70s word?!?) to the music with you. For tickets (and a discount-upgrade) just go to www.supersinglemixers.com and read all about it.

So, I recommend that we stop and smell the roses, tell our friends how much we appreciate them, tell our kids (even the obnoxious teen-agers) that we think they're terrific, and call a friend to invite them to the concert. FYI, I have no financial interest in this event, just think it'll be great music and fun people. And that's a really nice combination.

Isn't this a better way to meet?

Remember that episode of Sex and The City where Carrie had a birthday and no one showed up for her dinner? When she finally connected with her girlfriends later that night, she was really sad and embarassed to reveal the reason for her sadness. She finally admitted, almost in tears, that she felt alone and her anguish was that there was no great guy in her life to wish her a happy birthhday.

A lot of us ladies are on a quest to find that guy, that special man who makes us laugh and is great in bed and adores us. And is there to wish us happiness on that special day. So we do a variety of things to find him, like using the internet or asking friends to set us up, or joining clubs in hopes that he is there. I'm not on any internet dating sites anymore, preferring to meet guys in real life, hence the WOW Cocktail Party plans. The first party was successful and fun and I'm planning another one soon, but meanwhile I received some reminders about the difficulty of finding that special guy.

In response to my Craigslist ad for singles our age who would want to come to our cocktail parties, I received this: To whom it may concern, I'm assuming you are a mature woman looking to meet interesting men for friendship and more. I was wondering how you feel about having a private party with a younger man. I am 36 and eager to meet some one about your age for possible LTR or just fun if that suits you. Is that a possibility. To whom it may concern? If you want to be that friendly with me, you'd better know my name. And thanks for the offer, but no. Really, no.

When I was placing the CL ad about the party, I took a few minutes to read the "women seeking men" section to check out my competition and found this one: IF YOU ARE 50+,IF YOU HAVE hair past your shoulders (not bald on top) IF YOU know how to dance,IF YOU ARE CHILD FREE,vegetarian,animal lover and love the Lord-,contacts welcome...Please ONLY if you fit ALL of the above..Photo please.. Geez, and we think we have unrealistic expections?

And in the men seeking women category, here is my favorite: Hello I am an experienced, widowed slave that is searching for a lifestyle (non pro) Mistress to devote myself to in a long term relationship that is surrounded by a safe/sane atomsphere. Due to my employment I am usually available on weekends. I believe in female supremacy and know that I am a slave that needs to serve. Please understand that this is not about sex but about my servitude and pleasing my Mistress. I will be happy to answer any questions you may have. Thank you for taking the time to read this and hopefully I will be kneeling at my new Mistress' feet soon. I am located in the San Fernando Valley and would appreciate a Mistress that is fairly close geographically. You know, the idea of a guy kneeling at my feet sounds kinda interesting, but wouldn't I just hate him after a while for being such a wimp?

And from a guy I'd never met or emailed: Hello Ellen, You sound like a very nice lady who has a lot going for her. I know that it would be enjoyable to discuss various topics with you and to travel together. However, I wanted to write you personally to let you know that I will not be able to pursue this relationship. I have started seeing another person. I hope that you succeed in meeting the match that you desire and have a bright future. Ya just gotta think, what if this new relationship of his lasts like one week or so and then he never has the chance to find out if I'm the woman of his dreams?!?

It's all really weird to me, this dating in my 50s thing. Especially dating online. After our first cocktail party last week, I realized that meeting new men in person can really be great fun and much more authentic than online. You guys were there, nicely dressed, smelling good, with smiles on your faces, and dancing your hearts out. And we ladies had the best time with you! So, the point of all this is that I'm planning the next party soon. I like what the Sex and The City girls decided, that they would be each other's "soul mates" and that the men they met and loved would be "the great guys they have fun with." Maybe those "great guys" will be at our next cocktail party! Stay tuned!

Ellen is going to a concert!

You think you know me, don't you? You think I'm this upstanding, self-sufficient, independent mother and grandmother who's a bit quirky (Ok, more than a bit, but whatever). That I live with a poodle and a tabby, that I'm single and mostly happy, that I created this women's group, that I can seem shy but really can do scary stuff, that I work for a brain surgeon, and that I like chocolate. That I graduated from college in 2001 with a degree in philosophy and that I'm kinda smart and a little weird, but nice to have around. At least I hope you think that. That sometimes I like to coccoon and sometimes I like to be social and that I walk for exercise. Geez, if I were tall and skinny and blond (and a few decades younger) I'd be the girl-next-door. Almost.

But you probably don't know that I was a hippie in the 60s, that I had long hair and smoked dope, that I got kicked out of medical assistant school for taking the teacher's son to a love-in, and that I had the first natural childbirth by Lamaze at Granada Hills Hospital. That I went to three Doors concerts, that I went to a Dylan concert at the Forum and pee-ed in the men's restroom, and that I met my daughter's father by walking into a house where I didn't know anyone because I heard a band playing inside. That I was taught to play piano and flute and guitar and loved, loved, loved folk music. I like to think that, even after many years of living a rather mainstream life, I still have that rebel inside of me, that girl who does what moves her regardless of what others will think. And still loves music.

So what brought up this trip to the past? Let's see if you can follow this: A few years ago, I met a guy who took me to Paris and Venice and we broke up, then had a few other short and fabulous relationships until the bad break-ups, then I decided not to date but to spend more time with girlfriends, so I formed this women's group, invited speakers to the meetings, invited Rookie to the meeting, got invited to her www.SuperSingleMixers.com events, got invited back to her event to be a staffer, and last week met a guy at one of her events who is producing a 70s concert and got invited to that!!! What goes around, comes around? It's about time I went back to a rock concert? Giving up the LA Times and TV was good karma?!? Maybe it's just time to have some fun. And listen to some good, live music!

So naturally, I want to share my good fortune and pass on the information about the concert to my loyal readers:

When: April 20th, 2007

Who: Rose Royce ("Car Wash") and Tierra ("Together"), comic George Perez

Where: The Warner Grand Theater, San Pedro, CA

Tickets: (562) 235-9052, www.backdoorwest.com (The concert music is playing there!)

Mention Rookie or book tickets thru her website www.supersinglemixers.com and

you get a discount/upgrade!

Dress: Prizes for the best outfit from the 70s!

Sounds like a great evening. Good music, the company of a cute guy, time with the girlfriends (a bunch of us are going), and a stroll back to the 70s. On the other hand, it's every girls worst nightmare - I have to dress like the 70s? What the heck should I wear?!?

Some of the pix from the Cocktail Party!!!

(If you click on any of these pix, they get really big!)

Frank and his two ladies.

OK, that's Frank (front left) dancing but I don't know with who (whom?) and then in the middle of the picture it's me and our Lauri slow dancing with Joe from Oxnard. He said it was his greatest fantasy to dance with two women. He said that.





The magnificant band Felonius Funk. They said that they want to do a Wednesday night Jazz night and want us to come. I'm making an email list of those of you who want to come to our next coed party, so email me (wowthatellen@yahoo.com) and tell me you want to be on the list.






These are the always lovely WOW ladies - Harriet, Lauri, and Heather!









That's Jim in the middle (very classy guy) and my hopefully new friend Susan from Pasadena and I can't remember the name of the really cute guy on the left. Forgive me.








Yes, that's the always amazing and beautiful Rookie and the charming Ed.

The WOW cocktail party? Fabulous!!!

Wow. I had this silly idea that it would be fun to get us off the computer and get us out in public with a great band at a nice club where we could meet fabulous men. What a concept! So I put an ad in the "women seeking men" section of Craigs List and reserved some tables at a local Hilton Lounge where I knew a cool band was playing and waited. About seventy or so guys from CL responded to the ad (where I asked for their pix and personal info) and I spent the week reading the emails and sending back an invitation with details to the party. Quite interesting, just that part of it. Most of the guys were good-looking and seemed like guys my ladies would like to meet. A few were stinkers, such as the guy who sent two close-ups of a certain body part and the others who refused to send their pix until I sent ones of the ladies. Or the guy who said we were too old to party and the other guy who called us hags!!! What do they know!

How did it turn out? Beyond my wildest imagination! I really had no idea who would show up or how everyone would interact at all. As soon as I walked in to the club, my tables were almost filled with my ladies and good-looking guys I'd never met and the night was on! One by one or two by two, our guys and gals walked in to the room, got a name tag and started meeting the others. Just like the "old days," we all mixed and mingled and danced and drank and laughed and paired off and danced some more. And it was amazing. The CL guys were really, really nice. I danced until my feet hurt and the music was the best. My ladies were beautiful and the men were better than I could imagine.

I really met the nicest guys! Where have you been hiding, you terrific men! I have to admit it was weird to meet guys I've never met but who have read my blog and know all about me and my life. One guy asked if I was over my cold and another guy told me how cute my grandchildren are. I just might have fallen in love with all of you guys - you were handsome, charming, and fun and I am just delighted to have met you!!! Thanks to you all for making the night so much fun.

So I vote we stop trying to find each other with online dating services and return to the "old days" when we meet like this. In real life. Pix to follow!

The Cocktail Party Experiment - Your Chance to Meet Us!

In my never-ending quest to make it easier and more fun to meet single people our age, WOW is hosting a cocktail party. I remember back, maybe ten or fifteen years ago, when it was easy to go out on a Saturday night and meet great single men my age. No, not the bar scene, where the guys were drunk and the women were treated like meat. I'm talking about singles dances, singles discussion groups, singles dinners, etc, etc. Other than our own Rookie (www.supersinglemixers.com), I can't find any fun places for us to meet. Oh sure, there's Speed Dating or No-Waiting-Dating, but we've done that and it was like aversion therapy. It was kinda dreadful and we never wanted to do it again. And, of course, there's online dating with Match.com or JDate or EHarmony, but that's so tedious and painstaking and rarely leads to a great relationship and it's left a lot of us just burned out.

So, back to the cocktail party. What if we meet at a local kinda upscale hotel lounge in Woodland Hills, I thought, and listen to a great band, have a drink, and do some dancing? No cover charge, it's a nice room, and the band is really good? How easy is that? So far, most of WOW is planning to attend and I'm doing some extensive advertising to draw a bigger crowd of both guys and gals and have received a surprising response so far. At the very least, it will be great music and good company for a few hours. At its best, we ladies will meet some gorgeous and fun guys that we might want to keep. Who wouldn't want to have that kind of fun?

So we're calling on all of you great guys (age 45 and up) to help us make this a successful experiment. Just email me at wowthatellen@yahoo.com and send me your picture (so I'll recognize you at the party) and tell me something about yourself that would make me crazy to meet you (and I'll share it with all the girls!) and I'll email back to you the details of the location. (Ladies interested in WOW are welcome, too!) Doesn't this sound like it'll be the best Saturday night you've had for a long time!!!!!